We all have an ego. It’s that little things that can help us survive, or it can be our down fall. It goes hand in hand with your psyche. Have you ever met someone who likes to brag and put other people down? They might be a little hostile and don’t trust others. The ego is something that comes later in life after you have gone from the infant/child stage, to the stage where outside influences and forces really start to work on your own personal life. Your ego is how you want to be seen but is controlled by your own fears based off of experiences, or religious or personal beliefs. Where the psyche has to do a lot with your past experiences and memories, the ego is more concerned about appearance of the current or future moment. It can really get in the way when you are trying to produce positive relationships and goals.
Blame it on the children. Even though the ego is really developed a little later in life, childhood experiences can really boost that ego of self doubt. If you had a negative childhood, you are more likely to have a big ego. Not to say that some other people who had good childhoods wouldn’t have a big ego either, but they perhaps had a different lifestyle where they felt like they had to work harder to be noticed or loved. Even as an adult, we have these inner children inside of us and they still contribute to how your ego reacts to different situations.
So how do we deal with our inner children? It’s quite simple really. Before you deal with your ego self, you have to take care of your inner children. During meditation, imagine that in front of you, is every age of yourself, from the time you were born, until now. So if you are 22, you will see, 22 of yourself. Imagine wrapping them in a soft white blanket of light. Reassure them and tell them that it will be okay and that they are loved. Hug them, cuddle them. These are your children. Once they are calm and happy, then you can start working on your ego self.
What are some aspect of your ego self that you should recognize? I’ve compiled a short yet long list of different aspects of the ego self. These are things that are easily recognizable in other people, and know that they are also in you.
- Need for power
- Past/future oriented
- Social intolerance
- Living up to this and that
Can you see some of these things in yourself? Are they things you want to change? If they are, great! The first step is recognizing and admitting. Are you ready to over come this ego self? Good! Here are some steps in learning how to release the ego self:
- Stop being offended
- Let go of the need to win
- Let go of the need to be right
- Let go of the need to be superior
- Let go of the need to have more
- Let go of identifying yourself by your own achievements or losses
- Let go of your reputation
It’s okay to have a good relationship with your ego, as long as it is a healthy one and one that benefits your soul. You have to remember that the souls goal is for positive development to become closer to the Divine. Don’t ever feel like ego is all bad. It’s not. It’s just how you use it. It’s like a tool. If you use it wrong, you can hurt yourself or others. Here’s another list of things that you want to work towards to create a better soul self:
- New orientation
- Social acceptance
- Just be